A Prickly Problem
by Dancyfrog
Summary: In foiling a robbery, Beast Boy finds he has a bit of a problem. Can he find his way out of this and can the others cope until he does?
1. Default Chapter

A Prickly Problem

Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Teen Titans. If I did, you would be reading this in a proper comic book and I would have a bit more money in my bank. You aren't and I don't. Do the math.

Chapter One:

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In the early morning hours, most people in the city are asleep, save for those such as DJ's, toll booth workers, 7-11 stores, and police officers.

And, of course, the crooks and thieves.

One such thief was carefully worming his way out of the back window of a pawn shop located in the far corners of the city, tucked away with other such buildings the better parts would like to forget about. And that is why this thief targeted this shop. If he tried to knock off a large bank or fancy jewelry store, he'd get caught and tossed in the slammer straight away but for this? Who cared if a small shop missed a few pieces of jewelry? It would take a long time at this rate to get rich but it would all add up in the long run. And he'd be safe, away from the eyes of the law. 

He froze when a piece of the window broke off and fell to the ground of the alleyway. It didn't make much of a noise but it was enough to echo about and start a few dogs barking in the distance. For a while he just stood there, perfectly still except for breathing, clutching his loot and just listening. Finally he relaxed enough to slowly make his way out of the alley and out to the street where his car was waiting. The further he got from the location of his crime, the more his confidence grew until he was almost striding casually along. All he had to do now was turn this corner….

And he ran straight into a solid wall.

No, it wasn't a wall, but it felt like one! He fell back, landing square on his rear and rubbed his head. When his eyes focused again, he noted two metallic legs planted right in front of him. Slowly he looked up and stared right into the angry eyes of Cyborg.

"Where d'you think you're goin', turkey?" the youth demanded.

The thief's eyes widened as he scrambled to his feet. "Aunnh. Ah! Auh!"

Cyborg gave a flat chuckle. "Wrong answer!"

The crook chose the next alley to try an escape, and discovered another figure standing there, holding what appeared to be a staff at the ready. "Hey. Don't you read the sign with the opening hours on it? Pretty plain to me." Again the thief backed away and ran off.

Another alley, and another figure. Cloaked and silent, just hovering there. On some ways more frightening than the other two.

The thief was running out of options now. No more alleys to go through, but perhaps the sewer? The nearby grate had been broken and was wide enough for a small man such as he to dive into. Not the best route but as long as it was an escape he'd take it. He made a quick scramble for it.

And found his way was once more blocked, and by all things, a green porcupine! It snorted and shook its quills in a menancing manner as it stood square in front of his last escape. This was the last straw. He just had to escape, so he reached into his pocket for the only weapon he could manage to aquire. He pulled it out and aimed it at Beast Boy. It was a small taiser gun, but maybe it would scare this thing off.

"No! Do not shoot Beast Boy!" came a voice from above. Starfire swooped in and pointed glowing hands at the thief. "Put down your weapon and surrender!"

Now the thief was completely rattled. He swung the gun first at Star then back at Beast Boy then at Star again. 

"Put down your weapon!" Star commanded again. Beast Boy growled and stepped forward. The crook once more aimed his gun at the porcupine. Steps behind him told him the others were coming up as well. "S-stay back!" he stammered. "Stay back or…or I'll shoot the….the…rat…thing….here."

Beast Boy sat up. 'Rat'? Didn't this joker know a porcupine when he saw one? Talk about lasps in education! He grunted in exasperation.

"I mean it! Move closer and it gets it! I'll sh-shoot, so help me!" Sweat was dripping down the thief's face as he tried to retain the upper hand. His hand quivered He moved his other over to steady it, and Starfire thought he was pulling the trigger.

"NO!" she shouted, and bright blasts leapt from her hands onto the crook. He cried out and in reflex his hands tightened against the trigger grip, sending out the barbs, wire and power into Beast Boy's body. Anguished squeals merged with the thief's moans as they both slumped to the ground.

"Oh no!" Star cried. She hurriedly landed and the others rushed up to help. She carefully lifted up the porcupine's head, avoiding as much of the quills as she could. "Is he….undamaged?"

"Let me see," Robin knelt down and after yanking out the wires from the gun, carefully felt Beast Boy's chest. "He's still breathing and his heart rate's strong. That gun just shoots enough electricity for a short stun, after all."

Star clasped her hands and uttered a sigh of relief. "Oh! I was worried! Ah, I see he is awakening already!"

Sure enough, Beast Boy's small black eyes blinked open and he stared out into space. Robin shook him carefully.

"C'mon, pal. Get up and walk it off. You'll be all right."

"Which is more than what I can say for this guy." Cyborg had picked up the thief, who dangled from his clench like a puppet. "He's still out cold. Quite a blast you gave him, Star."

"It was just a tiny burst. I did not want him to hurt Beast Boy." Star said worriedly. "Is he also undamaged?"

"Yeah. I think he'll just have a nice big headache soon, that's all. Lessee what we got here." The metal teen reached down and retrieved the bag of stolen goods and hefted it. "Not much here. He's a lightweight."

"Great." Robin snorted. "We get called out in the middle of the night and for what? Some small potatoes."

The statement confused Starfire. "But he is not potatoes, he is a man."

"'Small potatoes' means he's not worth bothering about," Raven explained. 

"Yeah," Robin answered, still miffed. "We should've had bigger fish to fry!"

"But we were not frying fish," Star did her best to understand. "I was sleeping, and Cyborg and Beast Boy were playing video games and….."

"Ah…never mind." Robin looked down at the porcupine which had gotten to his feet and had staggered forward a few steps. "Everybody ok now? Then let's head back." Here an impish grin crossed his face. "First one back to the Tower chooses tonight's movie!" And off he dashed.

Instantly Cyborg rose to the challenge. "Hey! No way are we gonna watch 'Matrix' again! C'mon, BB! Let's get movin'!"

Star laughed as she took to the skies, while Raven's only response was a slight rolling of the eyes.

It was a few moments before Star stopped everyone. "Wait! Beast Boy has not joined us!" They looked around and saw that she was right. Backtracking, they found their missing companion right where they had left him, standing groggily and staring straight ahead.

Cyborg folded his arms and called out "Hey BB! Come on! Or do you enjoy standing there being a bristlebutt?"

Beast Boy's response was to gaze up silently. Robin frowned.

"Hey, what's the matter? Change back. Let's go!"

Beast Boy quivered for a moment, then fell silent once more. The others gathered around, concerned now. 

"Beast Boy? What is wrong? Why do you not change?" Star knelt beside him and carefully laid her hand on his head. Beast Boy slumped to the ground again in a pathetic heap. "Oh! He is hurt!" 

"How can he be hurt? It was just an electric shock." Cyborg picked up the discarded gun and stretched the wires between his hands. "Unless it scrambled up what passes for BB's brains."

Beast Boy uttered an angry grumble at that.

"BB, can't you change back?" Robin asked directly. "Can you?"

Beast Boy looked at him and shook his head. Then he managed a shrug. "I think he can't change back, for some reason." Raven surmised. "He's stuck as he is." Star looked stricken.

"Oh we must get him back, quickly! Something is very wrong! He is so weak! Look at him!"

Beast Boy was completely sprawled, looking on the verge of passing out again and breathing in low moans.

As usual, Robin took quick charge. "Ok guys. Back to the Tower so we can figure this out. Cyborg, carry Beast Boy to the car. We'll go on ahead."

"Wait a minute! Why do –I- have to carry this?" Cyborg demanded. 

Robin looked back over his shoulder. "Because you're the only one who can." He answered. "Think about it."

"Yeah. Sure." Cyborg watched the others leave with a sour expression on his face. "Go ahead, take advantage of my metal might! Well, come on. Let's go."

As he reached down to grasp Beast Boy by the scruff of his neck, the porcupine sighed, shook back his quills, and waddled off in the direction of Cyborg's car. Cy stared after him in confusion.

"Why, you miserable little faker!" he growled.


	2. Chapter Two

A Prickly Problem

Disclaimer: Yeah, I know. I'm supposed to put this in the beginning of the story. So I forgot. Anyways, so I can be all legal and stuffs, here it is.

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'Ahem' I do not own Teen Titans. If I did, you would be reading this out of a proper comic book and I would have more money in my bank. You aren't, and I don't. Do the math.

Now back to the tale.

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Back at the Tower, voices were raised in the heat of an argument. Surprisingly enough, it wasn't Cyborg vs. Beast Boy, but rather Cyborg vs Starfire!

"I cannot believe you have done such a thing!" Star's eyes were flashing angrily, almost to the point of fighting strength. Cy had his hands up in defense against the onslaught. "After all, he -is- part of this team, no matter what form he is in!"

"Be reasonable, Star!" Cy protested. "It wasn't like I was driving cross-country or anything! Just back home! Short trip! And it didn't hurt him any!"

"It is the THOUGHT!" Star almost screamed. "To lock poor Beast Boy in the trunk was like…like…like treating him as if he were nothing more than a bag of flassgrid!!" 

At this Cyborg folded his arms in defiance. "Yeah, but I bet a bag of flassgrid, whatever that is, won't poke holes in the leather seats! You know that can't be repaired. I don't care -what- those commercials claim, once leather is torn, that's it! And I'm not drivin' around with back seats covered with patches of duct tape!"

"Come on, you two. We seem to have a more pressing problem at hand," Raven interrupted. "If Beast Boy can't change back, we have to figure out why."

"Yeah." Robin knelt down and stared at the green porcupine, rubbing his chin. "I don't think it'll be easy, having something like this around. It's not like having a poodle or something. "

"It's different, anyway." Cy stared down at Beast Boy, who was beginning to shift his paws uncomfortably. While he usually liked being the center of attention, to have a failing like this in the spotlight was something else again. "Heh, some mascot we got saddled with!"

Beast Boy looked up with narrowed black eyes and grunted angrily. Cy ignored it.

Robin sat back in front of the porcupine. "Try it again. Maybe you just needed a bit more time to recover from that blast." he suggested.

As they waited, Beast Boy stood still, then shivered slightly. He closed his eyes, but still the green porcupine remained as he was. The others seem to droop as much as his quills.

"Now what?" Cy wanted to know. Robin didn't answer, this was far out of his league. Raven stood there, lost in thought while Star decided the only course of action was…food!

"I shall prepare something for us to eat as we ponder this predicament," she offered. "Perhaps it will help."

"Any pizza left?" Robin called after her. "I know we still got some nachos somewhere, unless Cy pigged out before we left."

"Oh sure." Cy snorted. "This from the guy who scarfed the last soda."

Beast Boy was forgotten for the moment, but he trundled after the others dejectedly. Star was considerate enough to get him a plate but was puzzled for a moment when she poured him a glass of soy milk. She studied it for a moment, then took out a bowl and poured it into that. Setting both on the floor, she cheerfully patted the porcupine as he hungrily dug in. Cheerfully until she hit a quill. "Yipe!" she jerked back. "Beast Boy! That hurt!"

"That's what happens if you pat a porcupine," Cy said over his shoulder. "They got needles all over. That's why -I- was supposed to carry him back. He can't stick me."

"What an odd creature," Star murmured, then she saw Beast Boy give her a hurt look. "Oh! I am sorry! I did not mean -you- were odd, just this form." Beast Boy turned back to his milk, mollified.

"Can't you drink that a little quieter?" Cy complained. "You sound like a fat pig, slurping like that!"

Beast Boy growled, rattling his quills as he purposely lapped even louder. 

"Yeah? You wanna rattle -me-, pincushion?" Cy reached down and rapped Beast Boy on the head. The porcupine's nose went deep into his milk and he jerked up, sputtering the white liquid all over. Star was appalled.

"Cyborg! How could you?" Star mopped up the spilled milk and added more to the bowl.

"It's easy. Like this." Cy reached down and again rapped Beast Boy's head, who had turned back to his dinner after clearing his nose. Again he was dunked. Shaking milk from his muzzle, he reared up on his back legs and growled angrily at the metal youth, gnashing large orange teeth. "Heh. Cactus butt wants a piece of me!"

"This isn't helping any," Robin leaned back and stretched. "It's late. Maybe all he needs is rest. We all do." Here he added a yawn. "I'm going to bed. See you in the morning."

"It already -is- morning." Raven quietly observed. "Two in the morning, to be exact."

"Well, then I'll see you guys later in the morning. Good night. Or morning. Or something." Robin gave a wave and left. The others thought this a good idea and retired to their own rooms.

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When Beast Boy woke up, he was momentarily confused. Everything in his room seemed to have taken on an odd dimension. Then he remembered the events of the past night. He looked down and noted sourly that he was still a porcupine. He tried again to regain his normal form, but for whatever reason, he remained as he was. Closing his eyes, he tried again. Still nothing. The familiar feeling of changing continued to elude him.

This was beginning to worry him. Such a thing had never happened before. Morphing was so second nature to him that he never even gave it a thought. He just did it. Raven may have to concentrate on her spells and power and Star had to gather emotions for her abilities but changing shapes to Beast Boy was as natural as breathing. Just think of the animal and his DNA instantly tore apart and re-arranged itself so that he became that animal. Then think of his humanoid form and he returned to it. So what had gone wrong? Why couldn't he return? What if he was to remain a porcupine for the rest of his life? Beast Boy swallowed hard. He wouldn't be much use to the team if he did. After all, what could a porcupine do? Waddle about and stick people. He couldn't even play video games in this form. Was he to spend the rest of his days either tucked in this Tower as a mascot, or in a zoo? Beast Boy shook his head violently. No. He'd get back his true form, he just had to be patient and keep trying. Don't even think of failing now, BB, he told himself. Don't let yourself get depressed. You'll get back. The others will help. You'll see. You'll be all right.

After reassuring himself, he crawled out of his bed to attend to a more pressing need. He pushed the door to the bathroom open with his nose and waddled in, to discover yet another problem presenting itself.

He stared up at the toilet and thought 'Uh.How am I going to do this now??" The porcelain appliance looked much bigger than he remembered. He reared up but found he could only reach high enough to place his front paws on the rim. 'Yuch! That's disgusting!" Falling back down, he wove to and fro, thinking. 'Ok, now what? Man, I gotta go!' He glanced over at the bathtub. 'Ah. Disgusting yet again, but do I got a choice? I'll clean it up when I get back.'

He walked over to the tub and again reared up, but the smooth sides gave nothing for his claws to gripe. He scrabbled at the sides, then fell back, defeated. He sat down in the middle of his bathroom, painfully ruing the three bowls of milk he had consumed just hours before. He could think of no other way around this, so with a sigh he got up and returned to the door of his room. If a bear could do it in the woods, then so could he.

As he trundled down the hallway, he could faintly hear Robin's cheerful whistling in his own room. At least someone's in a good mood, Beast Boy thought bitterly. The whistle grew louder as the porcupine approached the source, then it was drowned out by the sound of water running as Robin turned on his shower.

Beast Boy's small black eyes widened in alarm at the sound. 'Oh man!' he whimpered as he increased his speed. Porcupines were not meant to run, he discovered. 'Thanks a lot, Rob.'

He slowed down a bit as he came near Cyborg's room. No whistling there, but he did hear movement as Cy was getting ready for the day. 'Clunk head,' Beast Boy grumbled, remembering the milk incident. 'Hope your batteries run down.' Again his eyes grew wide and he increased his speed on past as the sound of a flushing toilet reached his ears. 'No! No way! But then again…he -is- only half machine! Still, it's Not Fair!' he whined to himself.

When he reached the kitchen he could see the front door just a bit beyond. 'Almost there,' he sighed. 'Just a little further, BB, and relaxation at last!' He turned his head when he heard movement, but it was only Raven preparing her tea. He turned back to concentrate on reaching the door when she turned on the faucet to fill the kettle. Beast Boy closed his eyes tightly and uttered a low moan at the sound. 'Everything's against me today!'

He finally reached the door and looked up. To discover the controls far above his head. 'No.' he moaned. Then 'No! No. No. No. No. No!' banging his head against the door with each word.

"Beast Boy?" Star stood behind him, her hands clasped in front and her head to one side. "Do you wish to have breakfast now?"

'No,' Beast Boy thought desparately. 'I wish you to open this door!' He scratched at it by way of a hint. Star did not seem to take it.

'I have created a nice warm meal that I hope you shall enjoy! Come.'

Beast Boy paid her no mind, but continued to scratch at the door.

Scrabble scrabble scrabble scrabble.

Starr looked confused. "You wish to go out? But without breakfast? Why?"

Beast Boy's scratching became more urgent.

Scrabblescrabblescrabblescrabble.

Star brightened. "Oh! Perhaps you wish to take a morning walk first! How nice! Shall I accompany you? It is a beautiful day outside!"

SCRABBLESCRABBLESCRABBLESCRABBLE!!!

"Star?" Robin's voice came from the kitchen. "Can I see you for a minute? I need to know just where you were when you hit that creep last night. Maybe it'll help Beast Boy's problem."

"Yes Robin," she answered. "But Beast Boy is right here. I believe he wishes to go out for a morning walk."

The shrug was evident in Robin's voice. "Then let him out. And come here. I think I found something."

"Very well." Star hit the door control. "I am sorry, Beast Boy, but I shall take a walk with you some other time."

Beast Boy squeezed himself out the door as soon as it was wide enough to poke his nose through and hurried off. There wasn't much landscaping around the Tower but along the driveway someone had very considerately planted a row of thick hedges. Beast Boy forced his way into the midst of them and with a sigh of pure relief, was able to empty his overloaded bladder.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Author's note: There seems to be some confusion about the first two chapters. Chapter One refused to load properly, leaving Chapter Two to fill in both spots. I'll try to get it all straightened out.

Back to the tale.

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"So, you were here, Beast Boy is here, and the guy's about….here. Right?" Robin pointed at various points on a scribbled map spread across the kitchen table. Star studied it for a moment, then nodded.

"That is correct. And after he shot Beast Boy and I disabled him, you came from here, here and….ah…here?"

"Actually I was about here." Raven corrected. "Not that it makes much difference."

"I still don't know why a little shock like that would hurt him," Cyborg said through a mouthful of muffin. "He's gotten much worse before. Like the time he stuck that fork in the toaster. Or plugged in that busted video game. After I told him not to, of course." He shrugged and popped the remainder of his breakfast in his mouth. "If those shots didn't faze him, why would this?"

"Perhaps it's because he wasn't changed when he did those other things. He was still in his human form." Raven frowned. "But there is another factor here we haven't considered."

"Yeah? What?" Robin looked up at her. He hated loose ends and unconsidered factors.

"Starfire's blast. " Here Raven looked at Star. "Did you fire after he did? Or before? Or perhaps at the same time?"

"I am sure it was after." Star frowned in thought. "He shot Beast Boy and then I hit him. Or….it could be that I hit him before……..Or at the same time……" her voice trailed off.

"Well, that cleared -that- up!" Cy said. 

"Wait. Let's say that Star -did- fire at the same time that guy did. Wouldn't the extra power run along the wires of that taiser?"

"Yeah. Electricity has a way of doin' that." Cy agreed. "So what you're sayin' is, BB's problem is the result of both that gun -and- Star's power blast?"

"It would seem that way." Raven stated. This alarmed Star.

"Oh no! You are saying that I am the cause of Beast Boy's remaining in this form? It is my fault! Oh,I must apologize immediately!"

"Take it easy, Star! It's not like you did it on purpose. I'm sure BB will understand." Robin looked around and gave a puzzled frown. "By the way, where -is- BB?"

All four of the teens glanced about, then Star gave a sudden exclamation. "Oh! Earlier I opened the door so he could exit, but since he cannot open the door to go out…"

"He can't open it to get back in." Raven finished. "I'll get him."

Sure enough, when Raven opened the door, there was a rather disgruntled porcupine sitting in front. "Sorry, Beast Boy. We were working on your problem."

Beast Boy's attitude as he trundled past with a grunt was a 'Yeah right'. He joined the others in the kitchen and then sat up, snuffling hungrily. Star jumped up.

"Oh! Your breakfast! I have forgotten about it! Shall I warm it up for you?"

"Only thing that'll save -that- breakfast is to nuke it," Cy observed the meal in the large bowl. "You sure that's edible? It looks worse than his tofu!"

"I can assure you it is very eagerly consumed on my planet," Star said curtly as she set the bowl down and walked off. "In fact it is a delicacy. Even the infants look forward to this repast."

"Yeah, but infant whats?" Cy grabbed another muffin and stuck it in the toaster. As he waited on it, he noted Beast Boy's reaction to Star's offering. The porcupine sniffed at the bowl, then tentatively lapped the contents. Almost instantly he pulled back and spat out the mouthful as Cy chuckled in amusement.

"Now you know how -I- feel about your tofu!" he laughed as he grabbed his toasted muffin and spread almost a whole tablespoon of butter over it. "Bon appitite!"

He was about to devour his muffin when he glanced down and noted Beast Boy staring up at him in a hungry and sorrowful way. "Hey, don't be givin' me no puppy dog eyes. Star made your breakfast. Eat! What d'you think I'm gonna do? Run down to the pet store for some porcupine chow?"

Beast Boy sat up imploringly,still with his sad eyes on Cyborg.

"If I gotta eat your tofu mess, you gotta eat that stuff. Whatever it is." Cy turned his back but before he could take a bite, Beast Boy had walked around and was once more facing him. He sat up again and licked his muzzle. "You're pushin' it, bristle butt." Cy growled. 

"Say, what do porcupines eat anyway?" Robin said curiously. "Grass? Eggs? I know it can't be tofu."

"Tofu ain't something you find in nature. Oh, here! Quit lookin' at me like that!" Cy practically threw down the muffin, on which Beast Boy pounced and chewed away happily. "If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a porcupine beggin' at the table. I think some trainin's in order."

Raven said nothing, but replaced the bowl of nondescript food with a small dish of herbal tea. Beast Boy gave her a grateful look.

Robin decided to satisfy his curiosity about porcupines and retired to the library. Several shelves were loaded with books of various sizes but very few seem to have any information about animals. Finally he located one rather unused tome claiming to list each species of North American mammals and plomped down on the sofa to sift through it. The resulting dust made him sneeze.

"Let's see here. Man, there's a -lot- of animals here! Where to start?" He shuffled through the pages. "No, not whales….. he's not a seal….um….foxes…no…..he's not a hoofed mammal, I don't think. Hey Cyborg!" He called out. "Does BB have hooves?"

"I don't know. Lemme check." Cy reached down and picked up a startled squealing Beast Boy by one front foot. "Nope. He's got furry paws, that's all." He released his grip, allowing the porcupine to simply fall. Beast Boy sat there, glowering and gnashing his orange teeth. "Hey, Robin asked me a question. I had to answer it, didn't I? Eat your muffin."

Picking up the morsel, Beast Boy turned his back and stalked off, intending to pout in the living room.

"No hooves. That lets out rhinos, antelopes and deer." Robin flipped through more pages. "Hmmm, 'squirrel-like rodents'. Maybe he's a rodent. Um…yeah! Hey BB!" he called out. "You're a rodent!" He picked up the book and slowly walked to the living room, studying the chapter he had found featuring the strange animal, the porcupine. "Family Hystricidae. Hm, sounds like a brand of insecticide."

"Cyborg, could you and Raven assist me?" Star called from another room. "I think I may have a solution."

Cy tossed in the last bite of muffin and snorted at Robin's last announcement. "Rodent! Yep, don't need no book to tell me that! Yeah, I'm comin', Star."

Raven picked up her cup and followed Cy down the hall to another room.

This room was used as either a briefing room, or board games, whichever opportunity arose. At the moment, Star had the taiser gun spread along the table and was looking at it intently. When the other two entered, she pointed to the ends.

"Do you see this? The hooks have melted and merged." 

Cy picked them up and gave them a closer look. "Yep. Sure looks like a massive bolt went through these babies, all right."

"I fear…." Star folded her hands in front of her and looked down. "I fear that perhaps you are correct, Raven. I may have hit the thief at the same time he shot Beast Boy, thus resulting in my power adding to the shot from this weapon. Therefore, it is because of me that he is this way."

"Blaming yourself will not help matters. As Robin said before, it was an accident." Raven pursed her lips as she looked at the gun. "These things do happen."

"But…what do we do now?" Star anguished. "Beast Boy cannot remain this way!"

"Perhaps it's just because his system is overloaded, or something." Cy tossed the gun back on the table. "If we give him time, he'll work it out."

"That would be the thing to do." Raven agreed. "We have to wait."

"But….." Whatever Star was about to say was forgotten as a shrill shriek of utter pain suddenly sounded and echoed throughout the hallway. For a moment they stood frozen to the spot, staring at each other.

"That came from the living room!" Cyborg snapped. "Come on!"


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

The three bursts into the Tower's living room, fully expecting an all out attack, but all they saw was Robin standing ramrod straight in front of the sofa. His hands were behind him but his face held such an expression of intense agony that the others didn't let their guard down. 

Starfire hovered in front of him anxiously. "Robin! Are you all right? Was it your cry of extreme discomfort we heard?"

Cyborg joined her. "Yeah! What's goin' on?" 

Robin's mouth worked as he tried to form words. Cyborg scratched his head. "Huh?"

Starfire gasped and held her hands to her mouth. "Oh! He has been stricken with Grabgar!"

Now Cy's attention focused on her. "Huh? With what??"

"Grabgar. It's an illness that robs the victim of speech. We have to make some beerabble syrup for him to gargle with."

"I don't think that's the problem here," Raven remarked. "It's probably something he ate. Again."

"So tell us! What's wrong with you, man?" Cy demanded.

"I…." Robin hissed as he sucked air in and forced words out through clenched teeth. "I. Sat. On. Beast. Boy….."

"Huh?" Now the gazes turned to a very disheveled porcupine sprawled on the sofa, eyes glazed and staring while his mouth worked in gaspy wheezes. Star shifted her concern.

"Oh! He is hurt!" She landed in front of Beast Boy and knelt down anxiously. "Beast Boy, are you all right?"

"Probably just got the wind squashed outta him." Cy observed as he walked around their leader. "Rob's a skinny guy but he's still got some weight. But boy!" Here he uttered a low whistle at the sight of several long quills. "Did BB do a number on you!" He reached down and yanked out a single quill from Robin's posterior, causing the teen to yelp and spin about.

"Yeowch! That hurt!"

Cy shrugged. "Well, they gotta come out. What do you want, Raven to teleport 'em?"

Instead of answering, Robin cast a glance of mute appeal to the cloaked figure. Raven pursed her mouth, then held up one hand. When the ball of darkened light appeared around it, she gave a yank. One quill was plucked from its seating but also yanked another cry from Robin. Raven shrugged and the light faded.

"Do you wish me to assist you in removing the points?" Star offered. Robin flushed clear to his hair and backed away carefully.

"Ah…no, Star. Um…thanks but….but I think Cy can handle it. Why don't you see to Beast Boy? Make sure he's recovered." He suggested. Cy grinned which caused Robin to give him a frown.

"All right. Make yourself comfortable on the couch." The mechanized teen ordered. "Doctor Cy is about to operate!"

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were enjoying this!" Robin grumbled as he gingerly laid down on his stomach. "Mmph. Ow."

"Hey, you shoulda watched where you were sittin'." Cy rejoined. Robin gave a growl.

"I'm not exactly in the habit of checking for porcupines in the living room! Ow."

The mentioned porcupine shook himself and looked over at the suffering teen, having recovered from the incident in somewhat better shape. Robin glared at him.

"Not one w..OW! word!" he ordered. "You hear me? Not a s..OUCH!…single word!" Beast Boy shrunk back.

"Hmmm. You know, since these quills came from BB, don't you think we should find a way to put them back? I mean, what if he's missin' an ear or something cuz he doesn't have it all together anymore?" Cy wondered as he plucked and pulled.

Robin's answer was muffled from the cushion he was biting but Cy gathered it had to do with just what Beast Boy could do with his quills. Cy grinned again.

"Hey, this gives me an idea about the movie tonight. Ever see 'Texas Across The River'? It's an old cowboy flick. Dean Martin plays this cowboy who gets shot with an arrow right in his rear." 

Starfire frowned. "Cyborg, I do not think that would be a pleasant movie for Robin to watch."

"No? Then how about 'City Slickers'? I always liked that one scene when Billy Crystal ran with those bulls."

"Will you OW! Stop with that?" Robin raised his head from the cushion long enough to make that demand.

"Ok ok, just tryin' to make polite conversation, that's all." Cy yanked out another quill from his twitching patient and studied it casually. "It coulda been worse, you know. BB coulda been a skunk!"

Beast Boy wrinkled his nose in distaste, Star did the same with puzzlement. "Skunk? What is a skunk?"

"A very smelly beast." Raven explained. "And the smell doesn't go away easily. I'd say between the two Robin got off lightly."

"That's easy for y..OWWWW! you to say!" Robin punched the sofa in pained frustration. "Don't you two girls have something…URGH!….better to do?"

"Oh, shall we boil some water, or something?" Raven offered dryly. Star took it seriously.

"Yes! Robin shall need some strengthening soup after this! I shall make some." 

"Fine. Make soup." Cy said absently. "And later we can have some shish-ka-bobs!"

"Not funny, Cy." Robin moaned. "Not…ARGH!…funny at all!"

Beast Boy quietly made his way out of the room.


End file.
